Every child has that moment of curiosity. In our minds we weigh the consequences of our actions as much as our immature minds can… And then it happens. The decision is made and we go for it. The pain and burning sensation instantly cause us to regret that decision and we begin crying out for help. The colors from the flames or the glow from the hot burner captured our imagination and we had to touch it.
We learn a valuable lesson not to touch the stove… most of the time. We grow up but we all eventually go back, but this time it’s not the flame or burner that we touch. We grab a hot-pot handle or a hot baking sheet… now we feel that pain again. But this time it doesn’t hurt as much. We draw the conclusion that now we can handle the heat, because we have now developed a tolerance to the heat. But what we don’t understand is although the pain has become more tolerable, the damage done isn’t.
This same flawed reasoning we apply to our lives. A friendship, family relationship, love connection, situationship, fling, “special” friendship, etc., catches our imagination and we go for it. We are hurt, deeply scarred and emotionally damaged and vow to never make that mistake again. We isolate ourselves and remove the threat or person from our lives and move forward with the assurance that we will never feel pain like that again. And we are right we won’t. We change our thought process and emotional checklist to make sure our emotional well-being. We change who we are because of the pain…. but we often ignore the effects of the damage.
That damage unchecked causes us to change who we are and how we view other people. We instantly push our jaded views and emotional scars on others never giving them the chance to stand on their own. I am guilty. I have allowed my pain to build my views of the people around me and I have allowed my pain to change the true nature of who I am. THAT ENDS TODAY.
Unlearning the false truths I have constructed because of pain is a painful and vulnerable process. Just like the young child who has to learn to use the pot, fire and burner to cook food, I have to expose myself again to the situations that hurt me but I can’t do that with the mindset that my pain has built. I must live in love. Love keeps no record of wrong doing. Love looks past the act that caused pain and loves the hurt person that caused the pain. Love embraces that person in a way that many of us have never experienced.
I am on another journey to discover who I am in Love and not pain. My message to you and myself, is to Love like you can lose…. because Love Wins.